I wasn’t going to post tonight, but I had to. You know how it happens: you read something so funny sometimes; you just have to spread the news, or it will eat you inside out.

I checked today’s Gary Leff’s View From the Wing post and found out that Greg from Frequent Miler was featured in Yahoo Travel. Actually, not him, but his “successful quest to earn a million miles in a month“. Why have I not found it on Greg’s site, I don’t know. He’s a humble, humble guy.

I absolutely love Greg’s blog and not because he gave five stars to my book once (oh, who am I kidding–that too!), but mostly for his meticulous, almost scientific approach to our hobby. He is incredibly detail-oriented, and if you are paying attention and determined to learn the ins and outs of our game, his blog may turn you from a timid hobbyist into a real pro.

The story was OK. It was slightly formulaic, a bit cursory, but it’s an internet post, not a White Paper. It briefly described some techniques used by Greg, and it had some tips from Gary and Randy Peterson. Fair enough, I thought.

And then there were comments. Oh! My! God!

No, not like this. Perhaps like this: ohmygodohmygodohmygod!!!

Folks, let me tell you something. I’ve read and heard a lot of things about our hobby. Many idiotic things. Some things I’ve read in blogs. Some I read in the reviews to my own books. Some things I’ve heard from friends and strangers.  A lot of things that have evoked the need for a proverbial double facepalm, which–let me tell you–was never adequate enough to convey my disbelief. But some comments to this article easily take the cake–with gusto!

First comment from someone called Bigtime immediately hit me like a lightning bolt!

• Bigtime!  •  14 hours ago

  What a stupid article. He sold the merchandise he bought on Amazon? Too much work for someone who actually has a life and job!

Well, I have no idea if Greg has a life or not, but even if we forget that blogging is his job, still: seriously? One million miles and points in a month is not good enough for a side income? OK, OK, not income. It’s a hobby, why do I keep forgetting that!

Well, you know me! But in case you don’t, I’ll tell you what I did. I logged on to my Yahoo account to give this dude a snappy response, when the next comment stopped me right in my tracks. Please forgive me for not using a spell checker on this passage. It’s better this way.

• rick b  •  9 hours ago

  LMFAO, I can do it for less then a grand, but you have to do it so you dont stand out, since it sits on the edge of being illegal if you abuse this technique. Get a credit card that pays miles, buy coins ie quarters [sic!!!], from the US Treasurey, after getting coins, pay back the CC company ( a bank CC) directly back to the cc issuing bank the coins you got from Treasury and BAM miles, stretch this out over 6 months to a year to not draw attention, but if you a risk taker you can do it in 2 wks. Easy way to build credit if you got the disapline too

Yes Rick. Go and buy quarters. But first, build us all a time machine that would take us back to 2011. You know, one small step for a man…

At this point, I realized that responding to every insanely ridiculous remark in that thread would be a dubious task indeed. Instead, I copied the most outstanding ones so my readers could enjoy them as much as I did. So… enjoy.

• Craven Moorehead  •  9 hours ago

  Apparently this moron places zero value on his TIME invested in this utterly absurd and #$%$ “scheme”

Apparently, the ability to use special characters is the most important asset for any intelligent individual who values his time above zero. Like vous.

• Capn S  •  15 hours ago

  If he can get a million in 30 days then I can get a Billion in a year.

I’m listening?

• Dick Hertz  •  17 hours ago

  The tsa better not find out about this. they might double dip on him. going on board with all those points

tsa, Dick? No capital letters? That’s fine. I don’t have too much respect for them, double dipping mile police, them.

• ScottD  •  1 day ago

  he is lying not for 1000 dollars bull ship

Bull ship? Moo ahoy!

• ibinaround2  •  13 hours ago

  “That’s not a valuable use of your miles, coming in at about half a penny per mile, for home electronics.” Not true, I just redeemed 70,000 Southwest miles for $700 in gift cards to get a 55″ smart TV…

TV! Smart! A penny for a mile! Hallelujah!

• Terry  •  1 day ago

  Who wants to be on an airplane for so many trips and time. That would suck with the TSA searches and time you have to spend in an airport which is more time then you spend on the plane. I dread having to get on an airplane as it stresses me out. I prefer to drive.

I know, right? Carpool to Paris, anyone? I‘m in Brooklyn.

• G-money  •  1 day ago

  so 1m miles gets you what, an extra bag of pretzels?

Yes, but you can upgrade to chocolate chip cookies for free.

• A Yahoo reader  •  10 hours ago

  1 Million miles for $1000? How much debt and crazy interest fees do you need to pay, lolololol!!! And try and find an award seat on flights you actually want to fly – sure, if you route thru Peoria you can get to Dallas from Houston and sit in the airport for 6 hours to travel for “free”. Thanks, but no thanks.

Lolololol, indeed! How crazy it is to pay your balance in full every month and avoid all the debt and crazy interest! I mean, who in the right mind…

• Christopher  •  23 hours ago

  What a shame that all major airlines are phasing out miles over the next few years. Still a good accomplishment, I guess.

What? No, really! What? Seriously, dude, you’re freaking me out. I know, you’ve pulled it out of your ass, but still… What???

• J.  •  1 day ago

  Getting air miles is not the problem, try using them, therein is where the problem lies. Airlines are a big bait and switch operation. The best alternative is to turn your air miles into hotel points but be careful only certain airlines will allow this and American IS NOT ONE OF THEM!

Well, it is actually, but please don’t let me slow you down. You were saying? Therein, where does the problem lie?

• Keith  •  1 day ago

  Good luck to him using those useless points. It’s almost impossible to get a frequent flyer seat with award points anymore.

Almost? You’re almost too generous, sir.

——————\\\——————-

Wow! What a read! Hope you’ve had at least a  few chuckles, too.

What really boggles the mind about these and other “civilians” is not that they don’t get it. It’s their extreme and unforgiving arrogance that can only compete with equally extreme ignorance. Not only are they unwilling to learn a few elementary tricks that can dramatically change their quality of life, but they will cheerfully ridicule anyone who does something they don’t understand without the slightest grasp of what they are talking about.

And that’s the Yahoo Travel audience. Imagine other folks, those who have no interest in travel at all!

Do we really need more evidence that nobody cares about our secrets? You can yell about them from a rooftop or jump up and down on the Oprah’s couch; no one is listening…

Gee, it’s 3:00AM already, I’ve gotta find a new hobby. Pronto!